What You Need to Know about Social Media

Is social media really dangerous?

This week and next, we are joined by guest blogger Mary Elizabeth Blake, a first-year graduate student in the Marriage and Family Therapy program at Reformed Theological Seminary Jackson. After reading a paper she wrote on social media and narcissism, I urged her to share some of what she learned with our readers because it’s top-level, relevant information we need to know.

Life behind the screen

This ACTUALLY happened: Last week, I was reading in Starbucks and watched a group of 4 teenage girls walk in, order their coffee, sit down, and…stare at their own phones in silence. SILENCE! I mean, don’t get me wrong, this introvert cherishes quiet, but this scene stunned me. Has our ability to relate to others been confined to life behind a screen?

It is no secret that technology is slowly destroying the planet distracting us from the foundations of true community. If I were the mother of any of those girls and saw her idea of “hanging out with friends,” I would probably embarrass her by sitting her down for a little chit-chat on what real community looks like and reminding her of the immanent dangers of social media usage. Then I would drive her home, pull out my memory box, hand her my Razr flip phone, teach her T-9, and take her iPhone away. (Okay, I’m probably going to need some parenting tips before Caleb and I have children!)

The good of social media

But if I am truthful to myself, to you, and to my hypothetical daughter, I love my phone and social media just as much as these girls do. There are so many wonderful opportunities that the Internet provides for us like catching up with old friends, making new ones, learning new things, supporting businesses we couldn’t otherwise support, showing everyone what our dogs look like when they are sleeping, and the list goes on and on…

You may be thinking: Please, Mary Elizabeth, spare us all the dangers of social media!!! Okay, friends, I will save you from hearing ALL of the dangers. However, I think as a community of believers who live primarily in relation to God and secondarily in relation to other people, we are responsible for recognizing how sin stains even the things that were created for good.

3 Dangers of Social Media

Danger 1: Narcissism

Social media sites and applications are formed around the idea of ME! MySpace was one of the first major social media sites – the title alone reveals their investment in “ME.” The me-centered mentality is further fed by individuals on these sites posting selfies, tracking likes, perfecting the following/follower ratio, etc. We are taught that we can regulate these things if we simply try hard enough. How does that shift over into our lifestyles offline? Not well, my friends. Our narcissistic personalities are frustrated in the “real world” by

1. the lack of control over our circumstances,
2. the fact that others are not centered on “ME” too, and
3. the feeling that real life is uninteresting compared to online life.

Danger 2: Depression

In a 2016 study of the correlation between depression and social media usage, about 29.2% of people aged 19-30 showed moderate symptoms of depression, and 26.5% showed high symptoms of depression. That’s over 50% of people¹! While the results of this study simply show us that people who use social media are very likely to become depressed, it fails to explore the how. Maybe you and I can take an educated stab at it. The DSM defines depression as “the presence of sad, empty, or irritable mood, accompanied by somatic and cognitive changes that significantly affect the individual’s capacity to function.”

• Have you ever looked at a picture of a friend’s party and felt sad because you weren’t invited?
• Have you ever seen a new mother’s post and felt physically and emotionally empty as you reflect on a previous miscarriage?
• Have you ever said, “not now, kiddo” to your child (or in my case, dog child) as you swipe through your Instagram feed?

These are just a few examples of ways someone could experience social-media triggered depression.

Danger 3: Habituation

I love routine. I wake up every morning, make a cup of coffee, sit down next to my dog, read my Bible, and begin schoolwork. I actually think God loves routine (as exemplified in his unchanging grace and in covenantal faithfulness). Social media thrives on our usage, and will continue to draw us in with new features and reminders when we’ve been away for a while.

If you notice yourself needing to check in online every other hour or so, it may have become habitual for you. The difference between routine and habit is intentional cognitive choice. Are you clicking the app because it is routine (you are choosing) to see what is going on with friends, or are you clicking out of habit, almost unaware that you are even doing so?

If you’re like me, you may be feeling overwhelmed with hearing the dangers of something that was built to be fun and enjoyed! Rest assured – there are healthy ways to use social media and other online resources. Stay tuned — next week, I will share some ways to fight the dangers and enjoy social media appropriately.

References:

1. Lin, L.Y, Sidani, J.E., Shensa, A., Radovic, A. Miller, E., Colditz, J.B., Hoffman, B.L, Giles, L.M, & Primack, B.A. (2016). Association between social media use and depression among U.S. young adults. Depression and Anxiety, 33, 323–331. http://dx.doi.org/10.1002/da.22466