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Something Worth Waiting For

by | May 18, 2021 | Caregiving, Suffering, Weekly Gospel Meditation

Something Worth Waiting For

Hi Friends, in this season after a year of so many canceled celebrations, many of us are anticipating graduations and reunions and vacations. But I’m aware that some are still stuck in very painful, anxiety-inducing waits. Wherever this day finds you, I pray this excerpt from The Waiting Room reminds you of the hope we all have in the day that is worth waiting for. 

I will tell of the Lord’s unfailing love. I will praise the Lord for all he has done. I will rejoice in his great goodness to Israel, which he has granted according to his mercy and love. Isaiah 63:7, NLT

After our son’s second brain surgery, a small piece of his skull had become infected, and the neurosurgeon had removed it. Six months later, they would implant a synthetic skull piece to replace the one removed. We were all eager for our son to have this fourth, and hopefully, final surgery.

The day finally arrived for this surgery. When we arrived at pre-op at the appointed time, ten a.m., there was a delay; we were asked to remain in the surgical waiting area. Finally, around noon, our son was taken to pre-op. Forty-five minutes later, my husband and I were invited back to wait with him. An hour went by, then two. We were told that the neurosurgeon was involved in a very complex surgery; we’d have to wait a while longer. As the wait was extended, my restlessness increased, but my husband and our son remained fairly calm. Finally, at six p.m., eight hours after he had been told to report, our son was taken back to surgery. Less than two hours later, the surgery was over, and all was well.

Amy Carmichael, missionary to India, puts words to how I felt in that “longest wait”: “…sometimes we are tempted to discouragement. So often we have believed that what we asked was about to be given, and then have been disappointed. But delays are for the trial of faith, not for its discouragement.” [emphasis added][i]

In the delay, my faith had indeed been tried. I held my tongue, because I did not want to infect our son with my anxiety, but internally, I was fantasizing about running down the hall of pre-op, screaming, “We can’t take this anymore!” I later asked our son, “How did you stand that long wait?” He answered very simply, “I knew they were going to come get me eventually.”

In order to wait well, we must know that the Lord is “going to come get us eventually.” As Isaiah 63:7-9 reminds us, we have every reason to believe in the Lord’s unfailing love. Despite Israel’s repeated disobedience, the Lord has shown them “great goodness,” “which he has granted according to his mercy and love” (Isaiah 63:7). As Isaiah also reminds us, “In all their suffering, he also suffered, and he personally rescued them….” (Isaiah 63:9, NLT).

Indeed, we have every reason to trust. God did not delay in sending Jesus to rescue us from the suffering of our sin. And, though it may seem like a long wait, God does not delay in sending Jesus back for us. When Jesus arrives, we will affirm, as Amy Carmichael so eloquently writes, “‘Lord, this was worth waiting for.’”[ii]

Prayer

Lord, in our longest waits, help us to remember your unfailing love and abundant mercy. May we never forget that you are coming back for us and that the sweet reunion will be worth the wait. Amen.

Further Encouragement

Read Isaiah 63:7-9; Isaiah 65:17-25.

Listen to “It’s Hard to Wait” by Flo Paris at https://youtu.be/HbMsm328cu8.

For Reflection: What delays have you experienced during this journey? What helps you to wait well?

 

 

[i] Amy Carmichael, 258.

[ii] Carmichael, 258.

5 Ways to Address Spiritual Depression

by | Apr 27, 2021 | Caregiving, Gospel Coaching, Suffering

5 Ways to Address Spiritual Depression

Do you ever have those days…weeks…years, when your spiritual blood runs cold, when your deer-panting-thirst has itself seemingly dried up? Or when you’re parched, dying for a drink from God but his springed-up-well seems to be saturating other cracked hearts but not yours?

There’s no such thing as a simple cure for spiritual depression. But you knew that.
There are, however, some practical ways to proceed as you wait in this apparent spiritual-wasteland for the showers of grace to whet your soul again.
(In no certain order…they’re all important!

  1. Remember the stories of believers who have gone before: Elijah hiding in that cave (1 Kings 19),Jonah running from God’s call 2500 miles in the wrong direction (Jonah 1), Jesus agonizing in the Garden (Luke 22:44), sweating blood as he asked his Father to take the cup from him. Satan will try to tell you you’re the only one who has ever doubted, disobeyed, or dried up. Satan is a liar, and Scripture exposes him (Hebrews 10:13).

2. Remember the Word. What simple short lines of the Script can you recall in this season of sorrow?

  • “The Lord is near; do not be anxious for anything…” (Philippians. 4:5-6).
  • “He who is faithful will do it…” (1 Thessalonians 5:24).
  • “He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it…” (Phillippians 1:6).
  • “How long, Oh Lord? Will you forget me forever?” (Psalm 13:1).

Pin these to your Pinterest board, tape them to your mirror, or tie them onto your forehead like the ancient Jews did, and let the Author move your heart to live in his story.

3. Hang out with people who will remind you of God’s Word and the gospel life.Maybe you can’t remember the Scripture, or what you do remember just seems to accuse.

  1. You need people. Preachers, teachers, friends who remind you of what the gospel is all about: the gracious, merciful, Holy God, sent a completely perfect, righteous Son to save—us—a sinful people, completely unable to save ourselves with any four tricks or five tips.
  2. You need prayer. Scrawl help on the prayer request sheet, text someone who has said they would pray for you—don’t worry about not being able to verbalize your request – the Spirit knows.
  3. You need to hear the stories…of other people’s struggles and doubt and pain, of other people’s redemption and rescue, to see how our odd God has worked before in his own apparently ridiculous timing in his own bizarre methods (a talking donkey, for example).
  4. You need to tell your story. Even when all you can really say is “I don’t think I have a story right now,” or, “I sure as heck don’t understand the story God is writing right now.”

4. Remember God tells his story through general revelation. It may be a lone sunflower surprise sprouting from dried red clay (as God once showed me) or an ungainly-looking pelican flapping its wings. Or possibly the impossible happens and the consignment store has a sparkling NWT designer dress that’s just right for your daughter’s wedding. Look. Listen. God is showing and speaking his might and mercy in every nook and cranny of his universe.

5. Remember that seasons of spiritual depression are often connected to the broken stories that are the fallout of the fall. Sometimes what you’re experiencing is interconnected with physiological depression, anxiety or stress. And God has well-equipped particular people—counselors, physicians, coaches, and others to hear our stories and offer the help that will prepare us to receive the hope of the gospel.

A Prayer for Spiritual Depression

God our Creator,

You formed us and knew us even before we were in our mother’s womb. You, better than any counselor, understand our emotional and mental struggles. When we struggle to put one foot in front of the other in a spiritual desert, help us to know that we can simply cry out, “Help,” and you will answer us. You have given us true stories of real people who struggled as we have. Thank you. You have given us your Word that you will make all things new. Thank you. You give us reminders of your mercy in our everyday lives. Thank you. In Jesus’ loving name we pray, Amen.

A Prayer about Grieving with Hope

by | Apr 23, 2021 | Caregiving, Daily Prayer, Suffering

A Prayer about Grieving with Hope

Comforting God,

How kind your Word is—

you know that we will grieve when we lose loved ones, 

and you don’t tell us not to grieve.

and yet, you remind us 

that Jesus gives us every reason to hope for a brighter day 

even as we grieve. 

For we know that our loved ones lost to death 

are now with you if they trusted in you in this life. 

You told the thief on the cross, 

“Today, you will be with me in Paradise” (Luke 23:43). 

Yes, much about death and resurrection remains a mystery, 

but this much we know: 

one day, all who trust in Christ will be with you forever, 

bodies and souls fully restored. 

Oh, Lord, how we look forward to that day.

Read 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18.

Friends, I’m excited to be offering a workshop for caregivers as a part of an event considering the “Practical Theology of Death and Dying” to be held at First Presbyterian Church, Jackson, MS April 23-24. For more details, visit: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/fpc-evening-of-life-event-tickets-150820763965.

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A Prayer for When We’re Afraid

by | Apr 22, 2021 | Caregiving, Daily Prayer, Suffering

A Prayer for When We’re Afraid

Faithful Lord,

Thank you for your compassion for our fearfulness.

Today, we bring our fears to you:

When we are afraid

that we will fail at work, at school, as caregivers

[name any failures you fear],

we put our trust in you.

When we are afraid

that we have made the wrong decisions

for our children, for our loved ones, about our business, in our lives

[name any wrong decisions you fear],

we put our trust in you.

When we are afraid

that our health or the health of a loved one

will not improve

[name any health fears you have],

we put our trust in you.

When we are afraid

that we will lose our job or won’t find one soon

[name any fears about provision you have],

we put our trust in you.

Father, you know all of our fears,

and you invite us to bring them to you.

As we do so, calm our hearts and minds

in the sure hope of your kind provision. 

In Jesus’ trustworthy name. Amen.

Read Psalm 56:1-13.

Friends, I’m excited to be offering a workshop for caregivers as a part of an event considering the “Practical Theology of Death and Dying” to be held at First Presbyterian Church, Jackson, MS April 23-24. For more details, visit: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/fpc-evening-of-life-event-tickets-150820763965.

Get free printable prayer worksheet and cards

Send them now!

A Prayer about Bearing One Another’s Burdens

by | Apr 21, 2021 | Caregiving, Church, Daily Prayer

A Prayer about Bearing One Another’s Burdens

Merciful God,

How exquisitely you have designed your church, 

the body of Christ. 

You have called us to share our weakness

with you and with one another, 

and you tell us that in that weakness 

we find our greatest strength

—strength in dependence on Christ, 

strength in dependence on one another (2 Corinthians 12:8-10). 

Today, I pray especially for those in our body who are weak—

the bereft grieving the loss of a loved one, 

the caregiver serving a loved one through many hard days, 

the sick and frail struggling with illness, whether physical or mental….

[Name some weak people you would like to pray for….]

May we truly lift them up, not only in prayer but in service,

by bearing their burdens—

listening without trying to fix,

bringing meals or mowing lawns,

forgiving their irritability…

[Name some ways you might bear the burdens of someone who is weak….]

We pray too, that you would empower the weak 

with the humility and grace required 

to receive the loving care of the body of Christ. 

In Jesus’ burden-bearing name. Amen. 

Read Galatians 6:1-10.

Friends, I’m excited to be offering a workshop for caregivers as a part of an event considering the “Practical Theology of Death and Dying” to be held at First Presbyterian Church, Jackson, MS April 23-24. For more details, visit: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/fpc-evening-of-life-event-tickets-150820763965.

Get free printable prayer worksheet and cards

Send them now!

Eight Ways the Church Can Care for the Mentally Ill

by | Dec 8, 2020 | Caregiving, Suffering

Eight Ways the Church Can Care for the Mentally Ill

Dear Friends,

It’s not surprising that the holiday season can be hard on those afflicted with a mental disorder. The church is uniquely placed to respond, and now is the time to learn how we can better love the afflicted. I hope this blog helps us all consider how we can serve the least and the lost in this season.

Stigma, Shame, and Misunderstanding of the Mentally Ill

One of the greatest catalysts to our pain was the sense that we are alone. Amy Simpson, Troubled Minds: Mental Illness and the Church’s Mission

When author Amy Simpson’s mother was diagnosed with schizophrenia, church leaders and members didn’t know what to say, so they said little, leaving her family feeling alone and helpless.

“Can you explain to me why Anna’s bipolar disorder and her dependence on medication is not an issue of weak faith or sin?”

A church leader asked this question of psychologist Matthew S. Stanford, author of Grace for the Afflicted: A Clinical and Biblical Perspective on Mental Illness. As Stanford points out, the question arose from the leader’s ignorance of the neurochemical component of mental illness.

As both vignettes suggest, the church needs to be better equipped to respond lovingly to people who suffer from mental illness.

Before COVID-19, one in four North Americans and one in five people worldwide suffered from a diagnosable mental illness; experts predict the post-COVID numbers will climb. Mental illness, defined as “‘medical conditions that disrupt a person’s thinking, feeling, mood, ability to relate to others and daily functioning” includes such disorders as “major depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), panic disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, and borderline personality disorder” (Simpson, Troubled Minds, 37). Because of the many barriers the mentally ill often face in finding help, the church is one of the first places they may turn. As Dr. Stanford explains in his book, “The involvement of the church in mental health is the missing piece necessary to transform our broken system, making it accessible and more effective” (Stanford, Grace for the Afflicted, 254). Churches are well-placed to minister to this segment of the least and the lost—how can we rise to the challenge?

Is the Church Equipped to Respond to Mental Illness?

A Lifeway Study of 2014 revealed that most churches are ill-equipped to respond to the mentally ill. The following struggles were noted:

  • Lack of plans to come alongside families (note: 17% of youth suffer from a mental health disorder).
  • Lack of counselors on staff.
  • Lack of training for leaders on recognizing and responding to mental illness.
  • Lack of communication to congregations about mental health resources.
  • A “stigma and culture of silence that leads to shame” (Lifeway Study of Acute Mental Illness and Christian Faith Research Report)

Eight Practical Ways the Church Can Care for the Mentally Ill

As members of the body of Christ, what steps can we take to care well for the mentally ill and their families? Let’s consider the following eight possibilities:

  1. Educate and equip pastors and ministry leaders to recognize and respond.

The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI.org), has programs (Nami FaithNet) specifically designed to educate clergy and religious organizations on how they can help.

  1. Educate the congregation.

An adult education class about mental illness could focus around a book like Matthew S. Stanford’s Grace for the Afflicted or Amy Simpson’s Troubled Minds. Some churches hold classes led by professional counselors on mental health and a biblical perspective.

  1. Speak out with compassion.

Pastors and ministry leaders can speak openly about mental illness in sermons, Sunday school, Bible studies, and small groups. As they communicate care and concern, the afflicted recognize a safe place to share struggles.

  1. Make mental illness part of pastoral care ministries.

A pastoral care ministry could develop and publicize a list of mental health resources that includes local counselors, support groups, and the number of local warmlines as well as suicide hotlines (e.g., The Florida CLEAR warmline, which is, “for individuals with a mental illness who want to talk with someone who shares personal experience coping with mental health issues”).

  1. Address biblical misconceptions.

Pastors and ministry leaders can address biblical misconceptions about mental illness, particularly as related to suicide. As Dr. Stanford explains, “When an individual comes to a saving faith in Jesus, they are made righteous and forgiven for every sin; past, present, and future, including suicide (Ephesians 1:7)….Suicide is not the determining factor for eternal life; a saving faith in Jesus is.” (Stanford, p. 232).

  1. Offer support groups.

Many churches have begun support groups for the mentally ill and their families. At New Heights Church in Vancouver, Washington, pastor’s wife Cindy Hannan began a group after experiencing profound loneliness when her son was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. She partnered with a physician on staff of the church medical clinic, Dr. Elaine Tse. They believe that “with medication, counseling, and good support, people with mental illness can flourish” (Simpson, Troubled Minds, 212). For more information on beginning a support group in your local church, check out Grace Alliance and Fresh Hope.

  1. Listen well and offer the hope of Christ.

One of the most valuable ways to offer community support to the mentally ill and their loved ones is to listen empathetically without trying to fix.  Hope is essential to recovery and healthy living. We as Christians have the hope that surpasses all understanding, the firm conviction that Jesus Christ will return to restore all broken creation.

    1. Pray.

Finally, we should always begin and end with prayer. Pastors and ministry leaders can be intentional about praying for the mentally and emotionally afflicted as well as the physically afflicted. We as individuals can make a regular practice of praying for all people affected by mental illness.

In this season, which often intensifies suffering, may we pray and act to come alongside the mentally ill and their loved ones.

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